Saturday, January 16, 2021

Life Update That No One Asked For

Hello, 2021. I don't know what I did for the past twelve months but time surely flies, like crazy. 

My last post here was about the pandemic, and I can't believe months later, nothing has changed, NOTHING. Our lives are no longer the same. The post that I wrote here was at the early 'stage' of the pandemic & MCO thingy so I guess that's why I was so positive, when I re-read the things I wrote. But today, it suddenly got me thinking like wow, will I ever be that positive again? I didn't know my mental and emotional health are going to be affected by this pandemic and whatever's going on. I was so optimistic, remember? However, all praises to Allah, my family and I are still in the pink of health - that's something I should be thankful for every single day.

A lot of things had happened, some were painful and bitter, some were fun and memorable. I mean, that's the nature of life right? Fast forward to today, the day I'm writing this post - hello MCO, we meet again! I was supposed to go back to KL today and you know, start our new semester physically and not virtually 👀 But the government announced that MCO will be enforced again so basically everything is going haywire too. This is our very last semester and I can't believe that we are still stuck with online learning! It really really breaks my heart for the fact that I can't meet my friends and that everything is still 'abnormal'. Don't even get me started with my research because we all know that mine is a complete disaster, that's for sure. Based on the current situation, I don't think we'll be having any graduation ceremony as well like okay this is the MOST HEARTBREAKING news for me. Like, no convocation for my degree?! Tell me what's sadder than this?! 😭😢 Although nothing has been confirmed yet but by the look of it, we all know, we all know. 

By the way guys, it's already 2021 and I still have to struggle with my mental and emotional well-being huh?? New year, same me lol 💁 I don't want to go deeper into this because it's still hard for me to swallow and keep up. It's neither something that I'm proud of nor something that I'm comfortable talking but something I'm okay of mentioning, if that makes sense. One thing for sure though, this shit is real and I know a lot of people out there are also struggling. It's like a battle no one sees but I believe we are all fighters and warriors of our own. Take your time to be okay again because it's okay to not be okay 🌻 

I guess that's all for now. I'm running out of ideas to write although I know there's so much more I want to lol okay bye.